My mother hated for over 45 years for something I said in my teens, the hate only stopped when she died 16 months ago.
I was never able to please my late father, the only time he did praise me was when I enlisted in the Royal Air Force, thinking back that was more likely thanking me for getting out of his life for six years - during which time my parents had a nice time.
One thing that never occurred to me, until this morning and only then after a comment from my lovely wife, Linda. Linda said, "I think if you'd been a girl, you'd still have been the same person."
I'd always assumed that had I been a girl, my parents would have been able to mould me to their needs - what if I was wrong? What if my psychology had been transferred into a female body?
The concept raises some very interesting ideas - is psychology acquired from your ideas or from your codes?
I've wondered where I came from for years - not physically - but mentally, as neither of my parents were interested in reading, or writing. That aspect is closer to my late Uncle John who was known in the Whitby http://www.discoveryorkshirecoast.com/whitby not only as a good singer, but as a story teller.
In my ways of thinking I can see a lot of my relatives, but the more I look, the less of my parents I see.
I wonder how I would have turned out, had the genes been switched and I'd been a girl? Would I have been a Germaine Greer type, fighting for Women's Lib http://www.theguardian.com/books/germainegreer?
Do you see me more as the Ursula Le Guin variety writing sci-fi http://www.ursulakleguin.com/?
I have vowed not to try to write in the style of Catherine Cookson http://www.fictiondb.com/author/catherine-cookson~1548.htm. The reason being not that I find her style unpleasant - I haven't read her books - but I've read books in her style. The reason is I lived a life for several years like the ones we she describes, terrace housing, back-to-back, leading to the mill/ foundry or workhouse.
Another writer I wouldn't like to write in her style is Barbara Cartland http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/10252426/Barbara-Cartland-My-mum-always-played-the-heroine.html. Again, I have total admiration for the lady, anybody who can make a living writing has my utmost admiration.
Until now, I have stayed away from the glamorous world depicted in Dame Barbara's books, that is about to chance with my next assignment https://www.upwork.com/d/contracts/15815995.
As much as I hate to let anyone down, I will give this a go, but I think this is one task not in my remit.
Who would I liked to be like among lady writers? I see myself in the mould of Tammi Hoag http://www.cozy-mystery.com/tami-hoag.html I would liked to be like Kathy Reichs http://kathyreichs.com/ but I don't have her medical background.
OH yes, I was an addict, as much as any J K Rowling fan longed for the next Harry Potter book, I longed for the new Bones http://kathyreichs.com/category/books-by-kathy-reichs/. I admit it took me a long time to consider watching the TV series - it bears no relationship to the books - other than the main character, but I am as much a fan of the series as I was of the books.